How Steve saved Christmas – (poetic stylee)
‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse
The stockings were hung and made ready with glee
One for each dog, one for Steve, one for me!
The dogs were nestled all warm and snug in our bed
Which meant Steve and I ‘decided’ the floor instead
So Steve in his onesie and me with my Gin
Snuggled down for a lovely Christmas Eve in
When out on the lawn we heard a racket and howl
And all three dogs sat up and started to growl
We rushed to the window to discover the cause
And outside we spied none other than Santa Claus
He was small and round, but I saw as shock abated
He was red in the face ‘cos he was frustrated
He alighted his sleigh, flung his arms round a reindeer
Heaved a great sigh and said in a voice soft and yet clear;
“Oh Dasher oh Dancer, I fear I am no longer master”
And he shook his head and said “it’s a total disaster”
To the sleigh once more and to each coarser he beckoned;
“Up to the roof” and they were there in a second
Santa pops out of the chimney
Then down the chimney with much grunting and hullabaloo
Came a very grumpy Santa with words that were blue
“Why Santa, what is it” we cried, brushing soot from his jacket
“Well are either of you 7 year old Tallulah von Spracket?”
“I have a sleigh full of presents, so many, but now don’t you see?
Very few of my charges seem to be where they should be”
From his pocket he took a parchment, tatty, torn and so old
And said “Look here’s the address column marked here in bold”
“Oh I see” said Steve sagely, and I knew that he knew
That about this disaster he knew what to do
“Santa, you know Christmas will get later and later”
“If you insist on relying on such very poor data”
“How” cries Santa “Can I avoid all this trouble?”
“By getting your contacts cleaned at Data Bubble
There’s no need to panic, no need to fret
We’ll have all those gifts delivered safe yet”
And in a thrice, in a jiffy, in no time at all
It was sorted (although it was a very close call)
“Oh my friends” cried Santa, “I can’t thank you enough
“To do this without your help would have been tough”
And so glad was he that he had earned a reprieve
Many good gifts for us and the dogs did he leave
And he chuckled with mirth as he drank all Steve’s beer
Then tipped me a wink saying “see you next year”
And away he flew, saying, as he drove out of sight
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good Night!”
We wish all our customers a very happy Christmas and a prosperous New Year
